Okay somehow these days have been quite an upside down for me. Some days I feel okay, some days I feel off. Maybe because my MARA thing has not settled yet so I’m not completely fine, and completely complete (completely complete? LOL).

I went to the sponsorship unit to submit the documents needed by MARA for the allocation of my course. There are some days I feel happy because I have submitted everything needed in order for MARA to proceed with the next action, because I feel like okay I have done what I have to do at this stage, at my side. But at the same time I also feel like don’t be too preoccupied yet as this thing has not yet settled.

Okay I have never feel regret on changing course, on changing to an engineering course because I never liked the science course in the first place. But the thing that I feel quite regret is the things that are happening to me now. Sometimes I feel very regret as of why I didn’t take engineering in the first place. Like I’m so tired already, can all these pass by quicker? I just want to hold that degree in engineering, okay.

I don’t know whether to ugh or hmm or pfft now, because I know that I cannot sigh because that indicates that I’m not being grateful for what I have achieved, for what I have gotten, for what Allah had gave me so far.

I need more strength. I need to become stronger. I need more.